Breaking: Donald Trump is Bald


trump_baldDonald Trump confirmed Friday that he is, indeed, bald.

The former Republican lead announced at a press conference at Trump Towers that his once infamous mane has been replaced with a wig. Read his public statement below:

I regret to announce that my wonderful head of hair is now boring. Yes, I am bald and that is very boring. I’m going to wear a head-piece made by the best wig maker in the world. It looks exactly like my real hair. You won’t be able to tell the difference. If you can tell, you’re boring.”

No details have been released on the cause of Trump’s hair loss, though sources say it may be due to stress from his recent Iowa loss.

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